Time Well Spent

I suppose there's something about the end of the summer that makes me somewhat reflective. I want so badly to be able to pull out some huge life lesson I've gained from my experiences in the past three months. I took on huge responsibilities. I stepped outside of my comfort zone. But instead of feeling like I fulfilled some huge life destiny, I feel almost apathetic toward my experiences this summer. It's odd, actually, because I went into my camp job with very little expectations. I didn't think I would get anything particular out of it. And, for once, I think I got what I expected.

I did enjoy myself immensely at some points, but at other times I felt...empty. Even in the times when I was doing well spiritually. Much of that emptiness, I think, had to do with my position as Program Assistant. It took me away from annoying campers, for sure, but it also took me away from the good ones. And, more to the point, it kept my interactions with the counselors to a minimum (depending on the week).

I enjoy my alone time as much as the next person...possibly more. However, when alone time is forced, it can rapidly lose its value. I love cell phones. I love that if, at any point, I feel the need to talk to a good friend one-on-one, I can do it. I love the many, many letters I received this summer. I sent and received more snail mail letters this summer than during the rest of my life combined. Those letters kept me going. Those letters gave me more encouragement than the people sending them could have possibly understood.

Friends are such a vital, important part of my life. Friends have made my college experience. Grove City itself is a nice institution. I like the school. I like the professors. I like the campus. I love the people. So much. Every day there, I look around and am amazed by the people I'm surrounded by. They are all so accomplished, so fun, so full of life and full of spirit. I want to befriend so many of them. The sad thing is that there are so many people I live near and walk by every day that I know I'll never get the chance to really know. I obviously can't have 2,500 friends, but still...you get what I mean.

Even more importantly, the ones I have befriended continually blow me away. They bring a smile to my face. A one-sentence text from one of them can completely make my day. There have been times where misunderstandings with some of them have dampened my entire existence for days at a time.

And I know that that's not right. I need to find my joy in Christ alone. I know that. Still, my friends are a gift from God, and one that I need to constantly remind myself not to take for granted. I only have two more years at Grove City. Two years! I can hardly believe it. In some ways, the past two years feel like a lifetime. In others, I feel like I still live on GFNCS "The Best Hall Ever!"

All of this rambling about friends does have a point, it turns out. I've recently had to make a very trying decision about when to study abroad in Scotland. The idea of going to Scotland originally came to me because I needed something to read during an unbearable Spec Mind lecture. I picked up a brochure from a table in the SAC on the way to class, and from that day I've been hooked. Something deep inside me is telling me I'm supposed to go to Scotland.

The question was when. Spring or Summer? (Fall was out of the question due to what I like to call my "semester of social wellness" during fall of freshmen year.) Determining when I should go to Scotland has been one of the most difficult decisions I've had to make since deciding where to go to school. Both choices have major implications.

Summer ended up being a more expensive option...by a few thousand dollars. That is a lot of money. A lot of money that I do not have. If I were basing it completely on logic, I think that I would have to choose Spring. Fortunately, I'm not.

When I think of what I would have to give up to go to a different continent during a whole semester of Grove City, I can't stand the thought of doing it. Despite troubles I've had, despite drama that's occurred, despite how amazing I know Scotland would be, I would not trade any of the semesters I've had at Grove City for a free trip to Scotland, let alone one I have to pay for. The time I spend at Grove City is just too valuable to me. The people I spend my time with there are just too valuable to me. When I try to weigh people against money, people win every time.

It's just not in me to be logical in this situation. Once I graduate from Grove City, I can't go back. These college years are something I will miss when I graduate, so why should I voluntarily leave and miss out on a fourth of what's left? For a few thousand dollars? No. I can't do it. No experience in Scotland would be worth the same as being able to eat lunch every day for 5 months with people I love.

I talked to my parents about it, of course, and they fully support me. They said they can't 100% guarantee that I'll be able to go next summer (because financially anything can happen). But if everything goes according to plan, I'll be in Scotland next summer!!

So when it comes down to it, the decision wasn't that hard after all. All of this on top of the other wonderful bonuses of going in the summer:

• My GPA will be raised during the Spring, which I desperately need.
• I won't have to find a job next summer...ha.
• I can be a rugby officer (or at least run for a position).
• I get to be in Europe at the same time as one of my best friends!
• Scheduling will become much easier.

I'm very at peace with my decision. I'm even excited about my decision. I love my decision.

"I keep my friends as misers do their treasure, because, of all the things granted us by wisdom, none is greater or better than friendship."

Pietro Aretino (1537)